Divorce in the Social Media Age

Social media can be beneficial for its users and accomplish great good. 30 years ago, who would have suspected that family members across the world would be able to keep in touch the way that social media allows us to do today? Add onto all of this the artists who are able to share their work with a much broader audience, the ease with which ideas and communities can be fostered, and the millions who make their living as social media influencers. With all the good that social media can bring, of course, there is a downside. While social media has become almost white noise in the background of our lives, it would be a mistake to underestimate the dramatic effect it can have on a family law case – particularly divorce and child custody matters. Social media acts, after all, as a record of your life. And when a record of your life is available for scrutiny, you should expect that what you put out there will be scrutinized – and potentially weaponized – by a soon-to-be-ex-spouse.

Records and Discovery

In having this discussion, it is important that readers understand the critical concept of “discovery” in a divorce proceeding. Those who are considering divorce or who are in the midst of a divorce should be mindful of what recorded messages they are sending to their exes. The way the court system works, your ex and/or their attorney may be able to use your social media posts or messages as evidence against you. What is “relevant” evidence in a divorce proceeding? It could be a great number of things that vary in every divorce and custody case. An experienced attorney can provide specific advice and counsel concerning your own specific situation, but some items you generally need to be mindful of include:

Posts Containing Personal Information

The internet rarely forgets. You should expect anything you put out on a social media platform can be accessed by friends and foes alike. When you are in the middle of a divorce or custody hearing or anticipate you may be embroiled in one soon, be wary that anything that reflects personal thoughts or financial circumstances may be used against you.

To illustrate, imagine that your ex-spouse accuses you of abuse in the course of the divorce and custody case. Even if this is not true – the court does not live with you in your day-to-day life. The court makes determinations based on the evidence presented. What if your spouse enters into evidence several social media posts you created in anger, where you are livid and/or berating your spouse? It is unwise to believe that you can “filter” out access to these kinds of posts. While filters do exist that limit the audience for certain items you post, you are running the risk that someone who DOES see it believes your ex should see it as well and shares it with them.

Remember, at the end of the day, you retain the control here. Thoughtful consideration of anything you put out into the public sphere can protect your best interests.

Pictures that Work Against You

Just as language can be used against you – pictures can incriminate as well.

For example, let us imagine that your spouse wants full physical custody of your child. They enter into evidence a number of social media pictures and videos that establish that you regularly party throughout the week. While this would most likely not be determinative in such a case, it certainly does not work in your favor.

As another example, what if you are seeking spousal support (alimony) and state that it would be a terrible financial hardship to get by without your spouse providing such support? Your ex then offers into evidence photos you posted of your recent trip to Greece with your friends.

Regardless of the truth of the matter – the appearance of such things will likely not work in your favor.

Contact the Law Office of Bradley S. Sandler

The Law Office of Bradley S. Sandler is a divorce and family law practice built on successfully achieving results for clients. Contact the office today to discuss the specifics of your own case.